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$22 to avoid a huge tantrum. Today, I’ll take it. April 28, 2010

Posted by caizooka in autism, autism parenting.
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Well, we are now the proud owners of a $22 pink watering can. That is what it took for Oliver and I to be able to leave the nursery yesterday intact. Tuesdays mornings are our sacred Oliver-Mommy time. We always do something fun before he boards the bus at 12:30. Yesterday we went to the nursery because he wanted to buy some strawberries. We’ve been gardening gung-ho lately. Okay, not we, but me. And I wanted to rope him in so that we can spend more time outside. So, after I made him go with me all over the nursery, we settled on a few strawberry plants. We were having such a good time talking, laughing, and just plain joking around about nothing. On the way to the check out counter, the large rack of shiny, colored watering cans caught his eye. He just bolted for them. Not just the rack, but the pink one to be specific. He asked very nicely, ‘Mama, can we buy this pink watering can. Pleaaaaassssseeeee?’ I don’t want my kids to think that they can get anything and everything that they ask for. That is a bad precedent to set. I decided to steer him away to the other (less expensive) watering cans. He started to flip out. It’s really like something in his head just turned on and then Wham! Tantrum. I tried and tried to get him out of it. Judging parenting eyes were lurking. I totally held it together but then I just decided that it wasn’t worth it. I knew that if I gave in that both he and I would remember this as good memory. The take away from the morning wouldn’t be an image of myself leaving an abandoned shopping cart full of carefully selected strawberry plants in order to pick up my screaming, flailing child. I decided that the $22 to fork over for shiny pink metal watering can was worth it. And, it worked. We had a really good hour and a half after that until he got on the bus. If I didn’t give into him, that would have been an hour and a half of further escalating screaming. I would have spent the 3 hours when he was at school racking my brain how the situation could have been different and also how much I suck as a parent. We’ll consider the pink watering can an investment. Boy, does he love it!

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Comments»

1. Mom - April 28, 2010

I cannot wait to see the watering can. Seems like a good give and take situation to me – would have done the same! Good thinking and shopping. Pink!! Good job, our little Ollie.

2. Lori Gradinger - April 29, 2010

Karen,
This reminds me of the conversation we had last night about getting to a new level of seeing what is really important. The pink can represents a “WIN” for you and your son and the world of loving our kids in a strong, conscious way.

Do you know about The Seattle Children’s PlayGarden?
My wonderful brilliant friend Liz Bullard created this organization/ experience for children with disabilities and their parents….I think you would enjoy.

http://www.childrensplaygarden.org

Best, Lori

3. Kelly - April 30, 2010

Amen! I completely agree with your Mom. Money well spent.


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