Been trying to find time to write.  I’ve been thinking about things to write about as I have been busying myself with crazy projects. Redoing dining room tables, chairs, spreading 10 yards of compost. Attending board meetings, guild meetings, and trying to churn out a Christmas card.  Oh, and somewhere in there, Thanksgiving occurred. I used to think that Thanksgiving was the stupidest holiday ever.  A holiday that people just sit around, eat, and get fat.  Now I think that it is just plain glorious.  A day to just hang out with the family, wear pj’s all day, whip together a couple of dishes, then go to my mom and dads where we’ve never had a failed bird or bad stuffing.  Good wine, good laughs, and appreciating what we have.  Leading up to Thanksgiving I gathered a lot of my thoughts and thought so intently of all of the amazing, gracious people that have crossed our paths in our lives.  Without each one of them, I would be a different, less fulfilled person.  I’m so lucky. So grateful for a healthy and happy family and lovely friends. So lucky to have a family that claims me and I claim them, proudly. Not everyone is so lucky.  I really want to see the movie, The Blindside.  Anyone who has seen it tells me of how wonderful a story it is. I need a heart-wrenching, bring it home, tear jerker movie for inspiration.  Speaking of movies, I found myself laughing hysterically watching The Hangover. What a great laugh.  If you haven’t seen it, it is outrageous and a great, belly-laugh kind of movie. A must see.

I have been a bit stuck in where I am at.  What I should blog about. Now I’m clear in my gratitude.  Although gratitude was our family virtue of the week several weeks ago, it has been stuck in my head and in my heart.  It is what makes me tick right now. It is the most important virtue that I want to convey to my children at this time of year. What underscored my ability to write was a lovely phone call from my old babysitter, Lillian.  She used to babysit my sister and I when we lived in LA.  She is an older Japanese-American woman.  I’ve searched and searched for my Lillian to help me raise my kids.  I’m still searching. So, why did she phone me from San Luis Obispo? She wanted to verify our address before sending us fresh fruit from her garden.  My favorite fruit, kaki (persimmons), satsuma (mikan), and usually some nashi (Japanese pear-apples) as well.  The gift of fruit is not something that I ever partake in my life now but in Japan fruit was such a common gift. So sweet, and so in season. I spoke with Lillian for 20 minutes and every second that I spoke with her was like I was 4,5,6 years old. She doesn’t have any children of her own, but she is a mom.  She scolds me for not knowing the 4 extra numbers in my zipcode.  Apparently providing this information allows your shipment to arrive that much sooner than if you didn’t write those four numbers on the envelope.  If anyone tries to scold me in my life now I would probably tell them off, but from Lillian, I just say, ‘oh, yes, you’re right, I should know what the numbers are’.  Somehow you feel loved by someone caring enough to scold you over the phone. Strange concept indeed.  Strange but comforting.

Since our nanny has moved out life has become more complex, more emotional. I miss her. It was nice having her in our presence, in our home. I can piece meal the babysitting situation, but it was nice to have her here and all of us felt her absence this weekend, our first weekend without her in our home.  We’ll be okay. We’ll move on, but she is very much in our hearts. I’m grateful for the place that she hold in our hearts. Even if she doesn’t live here, we’ll see her and she’ll be a part of us.

Preparing for Christmas is proving to be more of a challenge than I had thought.  I am taking away all expectations other than that of EVERYTHING Christmas I want to come from the heart. We were going to get a Christmas tree today and I just decided that it wasn’t right.  Part of the way there, my brain, my heart just said no. I remember going to cut down a tree with my family to be a happy, fun experience, not one where everyone, including the mom, is grumped out.  The timing wasn’t right.  I’d rather wait longer and enjoy the experience. Is that bad? No one seemed to care one way or the other. Except that my mom was half way there to Marysville to meet us. My bad. We did have a great evening at there house though.

O is doing well. Less hitting. E is hitting less, too. J is hitting more. As much as I try and understand the necessity of roughhousing for boys in their development, I do really wish that it just plain would go away.  Thumb wrestle and get it out of your system!

Interestingly, the Special Ed placement person at Seattle School District visited O in his Pre-K program at View Ridge.  She suggested that he attend Kindergarten at the EEU this next year, then repeat Kindergarten the following year at View Ridge. I hadn’t thought of that possibility, but it makes sense.  I thought that he would repeat Pre-K, then attend one year of Kindergarten. Their thought was that he might get bored of repeating the Pre-K curriculum, but the Kindergarten curriculum is far more complex and he’d be better suited to repeat the latter. I agree with their assessment and hope that he gets into the EEU next fall. That would be fantastic.  We have fallen into the greatest ABA therapists.  Heather and Chelsea.  O sees them twice/week for social skills group and is really, really growing.

O uses his dogs as props. It’s really, super cute. ‘Snowflake’, his stuffed husky dog was at my parents house and he saw him and his eyes lit up.  He hugged him and told him that he was wondering where he was. He is so cute. His big love is ‘Puff’, a little stuffed dog that he tells everything to. He scold him, rewards him, puts him in time out, hugs him when he is sleeping.  It is adorable.